


other side of the screen

by solohux



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: M/M, Pining, Texting, texting in space
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-09-09 16:24:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8899180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/solohux/pseuds/solohux
Summary: Whilst Kylo is away, Hux comes to realise a few things when he and Kylo begin messaging each other.





	

The sharp buzz of a notification arriving on his datapad startles Hux awake. He sits upright, finding himself still sitting at his desk, paperwork spread across its surface untidily. Wiping the drool from the corner of his mouth, Hux clears his throat, feeling slightly embarrassed that he’d managed to drift asleep in the middle of his work, usually Kylo wakes him when he wants to fuck—

_Buzz! Buzz!_

Hux looks to his datapad, scowling at the annoying vibrations, wondering who could be bothering him on his personal messaging account at this time in the ship’s cycle.

 _REN, K._ [0438]: _hux?_

 _REN, K._ [0440]: _awake?_

Hux exhales slowly, trying to stop his rising tension at being disturbed by Kylo even when he isn’t on board.

 _Oh,_ Hux thinks. Yes. Kylo isn’t here, he’s on the other side of the galaxy, no doubt being put through his paces by the Supreme Leader, rigourous training regimes that’ll make a master out of the apprentice. Hux stretches, pulling his glowing datapad in front of him, frowning at Kylo’s name on the screen, cursing the insolent knight for waking him.

 _HUX, A._ [0441]: _I am now. What do you want?_

 _REN, K._ [0442]: _nothing in particular, I’m only allowed to have contact with others after I’ve completed a task._

 _REN, K._ [0442]: _and you’re the only contact I have in my datapad_

 _HUX, A._ [0443]: _so you thought you’d text me in the middle of the night for a chat? Charmed. Goodnight, Ren._

Hux rubs his tired eyes and switches his datapad off, silencing it, tossing it into one of his desk drawers for the night, hoping that their abrupt end of their conversation would deter Kylo from contacting him again. Shedding his uniform on the way to his bed, Hux rubs his neck, absently feeling over a tender patch of skin from where Kylo’s teeth had marked him, the pink shape of the Knight’s mouth fading back into the pale colour of his porcelain skin. As he climbs under his cold bedsheets, Hux feels glad that Kylo isn’t here; no one to exhaust him, no one to kick out of his bed after a quick fuck, no one to hold—.

Hux stops himself. His and Kylo’s arrangement is purely physical; no emotions involved, no exclusivity, nothing but sex.

Nothing.

It’s the next evening when Hux is having dinner alone in his quarters when his datapad flashes on with a notification, distracting him from the financial report he’s reading. With a roll of his eyes, he opens the message, cursing its sender.

 _REN, K._ [1902]: _that was rude_

 _HUX, A._ [1903]: _What can I say, I was annoyed that you’d disturbed me._

 _REN, K._ [1903]: _I didn’t know you were sleeping_

 _REN, K._ [1903]: _you stay up some nights to work so you couldve been doing that_

 _HUX, A._ [1904]: _You’re a mind-reader, aren’t you?_

 _REN, K._ [1905]: _it’s harder like this_

 _HUX, A._ [1905]: _Like what?_

 _REN, K._ [1906]: _being across the galaxy from the person you’re trying to read_

 _HUX, A._ [1907]: _Ah. Right. I see._

 _HUX, A._ [1910]: _Anything else you wanted, Ren?_

 _REN, K._ [1911]: _I’m not allowed to talk to anyone else_

Hux frowns at his datapad, taking a sip of wine from his glass, wondering what kind of training Snoke could possibly be putting Kylo through where his communications with other beings are limited.

 _HUX, A._ [1911]: _Why?_

 _REN, K._ [1913]: _Supreme Leader says it’s a distraction from my training and the force and the dark side should be my sole focus all the time_

 _HUX, A._ [1914]: _But he’s allowed you to have your datapad? How kind._

 _REN, K._ [1915]: _it’s meant to be as a reward for me being successful in the tasks he sets me_

 _HUX, A._ [1916]: _Tasks?_

For a moment, Hux imagines Kylo being trained like a circus animal; jumping through hoops and unleashing his power on whoever his master desires.

 _REN, K._ [1917]: _tests made to make me overcome my weaknesses_

 _REN, K._ [1917]: _help me let go of the light and make me stronger_

 _HUX, A._ [1919]: _Invigorating, I’m sure._

 _HUX, A._ [1919]: _I have work to do, Ren, so you’ll excuse me from this idle chit-chat. Goodnight._

But instead of casting his datapad aside, Hux sits and stares at the screen, awaiting the little bubble to pop up with Kylo’s reply, but it never comes. With a huff, Hux closes the messaging application off and returns to his report, denying his own anger at being ignored.

It’s three nights later when Hux hears the familiar sound of a message arriving on his datapad and he rushes out of the shower to read it, having personalised the tone of Kylo’s notifications. He’ll admit only to himself that he’s finding that _not_ having Kylo’s presence on board the _Finalizer_ is quickly beginning to bother him, though it’s not the physical relationship he’s missing. Even on-shift, Hux finds himself staring at the spots where Kylo favours to stand, watching over the workings on the bridge like a brilliantly tall statue, watching but never speaking, always there, a comforting figure when Hux’s stress headache is particularly bad. He misses the feel of Kylo’s lips against his skin, though not the rough and hungry kisses that consume him during their sex. It’s the soft after-kisses, post-orgasm, when Kylo’s mouth is slightly slack, his breath heavy and warm against Hux’s blushing skin, the _feeling_ of having someone be so gentle with him.

Hux brushes his wet hair out of his eyes and opens the message eagerly.

 _REN, K._ [2233]: _need you_

Hux stares with glistening eyes at the two words on the screen in front of him, wondering whether his lack of belief in destiny needs rethinking. _Kylo needs him,_ like the beach needs the sea, like the clouds need the sky, _like Hux needs Ren._

He ponders over his reply, wondering whether _‘I need you too’_ would be too much all at once. Hux feels as though he should’ve guessed that their no-strings relationship wouldn’t have lasted. After all, no one has made him _feel_ like Kylo Ren has.

His datapad buzzes again in his hands and Hux looks down, eager to see what else Kylo is thinking, expecting to see another romantic confession. But his world caves in on itself, crashing down in a mighty fall, his chest clenching as everything he’s been dwelling on hits the ground with an almighty bang.

 _REN, K._ [2235]: _fuck I’m so hard, hux_

 _REN, K._ [2235]: _just thinking of your tight ass_

 _REN, K._ [2236]: _need you_

 _REN, K._ [2236]: _need to fuck you_

Hux exhales slowly, closing his eyes, feeling droplets of water drip down from his wet hair, cascading over his cheeks. Even with his trembling fingers, he manages to compose a reply.

 _HUX, A._ [2238]: _I’m tired, Ren. Can’t you entertain yourself?_

 _REN, K._ [2239]: _don’t wanna_

 _REN, K._ [2239]: _want you to talk to me_

 _REN, K._ [2240]: _tell me what you’d do to get me off_

 _HUX, A._ [2241]: _You’re obscene._

 _REN, K._ [2241]: _but youre still talking to me_

Hux scowls. Kylo could be droning on about the weather and Hux would be talking to him, chatting to make the warm glow in his chest grow, making him doubt his desire that he and Kylo could ever be more than just physical.

 _HUX, A._ [2242]: _I’d make you come with just my mouth._

Hux sits himself down on his bed, allowing the towel he had around his waist to slip away, uncaring of where it falls to.

 _REN, K._ [2243]: _yes like that_

 _HUX, A._ [2244]: _You would lie back on your bed, I’d be in between your legs, kissing my way up your thighs to your cock_

 _HUX, A._ [2244]: _You’d be moaning, complaining that I’m going too slow but I want you to feel every suck and bite that I give you. Make it good._

Hux wraps his free hand around his own cock, imaging Kylo in his rooms on Snoke’s base, jerking himself off to the words that Hux is gifting him.

 _REN, K._ [2245]: _your mouth feels so good, tell me how you’d suck my cock hux_

 _HUX, A._ [2246]: _I’d start at the bottom, sucking and kissing, making sure my lips are nice and wet so you feel everything_

 _HUX, A._ [2247]: _I’d lick your cock, Ren. Suck so hard until you throw your head back and beg me to take you in my mouth where it’s warm and so wet. Kiss the tip, show you the come on my tongue, spread it over my lips to show you how good I’m making you feel._

Hux pumps his fist up and down his cock, licking his lips, imagining Kylo’s thick shaft dominating his mouth, precome slavered over his tongue, hungry for more.

 _REN, K._ [2248]: _let me fuck your mouth hux please so close need you_

Trying not to focus on the two _false_ words at the end of Kylo’s message, Hux swallows the remainder of his pride and rubs his thumb across the tip of his cock, wishing he could orgasm at the same time as Kylo.

 _HUX, A._ [2249]: _Fuck my mouth, Ren. I want your cock down my throat. Fill me. Keep fucking me. I want to taste you, come for me. Come._

Hux jerks himself harder, imagining Kylo bucking his hips upwards into Hux’s open mouth, gagging on it as it hits the back of his throat, filling his mouth, filling his thoughts. With a groan and a gasp, Hux comes, spilling his own seed into his hand, lines dripping down his stomach and dotting his thighs. After wiping his sticky hand on his towel, he stares down at his datapad, waiting for a message, _anything_ that’ll prove to him that Kylo thinks more of him than an object for his sexual desires.

His datapad buzzes, and Hux gasps in surprise.

 _REN, K._ [2252]: _needed that, thanks hux_

Hux sighs, torn between throwing his datapad across the room or holding it close to his chest.

 _HUX, A._ [2253]: _You’re welcome, Ren._

No more messages from Kylo appear after that, despite the intensity that Hux stares at the screen with, willing Kylo to come back to him with something more meaningful, hoping to rid him of the ache that’s growing within his chest from not having the ridiculous Knight next to him.

But Kylo stays quiet. No messages arrive from him for the remainder of the night, or the next morning. The day passes slowly, which turns into the passing week, and _another_ week. Hux takes to carrying his personal datapad around with him, afraid that he’ll miss any messages from Kylo, regardless of how small. He’ll settle for a simple ‘ _hello’_ at this point.

After 19 days of hearing nothing from Kylo, Hux opens his prized bottle of Corellian brandy, deciding to forego grabbing a tumbler; drinking from the bottle will soothe his ache. He sits down at his desk, uniform dishevelled, hair tousled, and takes his first swig of the brandy, savouring the burn.

With a huff, he opens his messaging application, and clicks on Kylo’s name.

 _HUX, A._ [0218]: _You’ve ruined me, Kylo Ren_

 _HUX, A._ [0218]: _Whatever magic trick you’ve played on me, undo it_

 _HUX, A._ [0218]: _Make the ache stop_

 _HUX, A._ [0219]: _I can’t go on like this_

 _HUX, A._ [0220]: _I miss you_

 _HUX, A._ [0227]: _And you don’t miss me_

 _HUX, A._ [0228]: _We promised not to get attached but I did_

 _HUX, A._ [0230]: _And I can’t take it back_

 _HUX, A._ [0231]: _You make me feel things that I feel forbidden to feel_

 _HUX, A._ [0232]: _Like I shouldn’t care about you because it’s just sex_

 _HUX, A._ [0233]: _Because that’s what we promised we’d keep it but fucking hell_

 _HUX, A._ [0234]: _Tell me that I mean more to you than that_

 _HUX, A._ [0237]: _Ren_

 _HUX, A._ [0238]: _Please_

 _HUX, A._ [0243]: _I thought I could keep myself apart from you but I can’t it’s too empty Ren it hurts_

 _HUX, A._ [0250]: _You said you needed me_

 _HUX, A._ [0250]: _Say it again_

 _HUX, A._ [0254]: _This is so ridiculous_

 _HUX, A._ [0259]: _Answer me, you brat_

 _HUX, A._ [0304]: _I miss you_

 _HUX, A._ [0317]: _I miss you_

 _HUX, A._ [0348]: _I love you_

After taking a large gulp of the last of the brandy, Hux cries out loudly, throwing his datapad at the wall, hearing the glass of the screen smash at it clangs to the floor. He stands in the middle of his quarters, shoulders shaking as his breath quickens unsteadily, cursing himself for allowing his feelings to rein over his logic. Kylo Ren is a calamity, a brutal mixture of raw emotions that cascade together like a dark supernova ready to explode without a second’s notice.

And Hux is willingly standing in the blast zone, waiting to be consumed by the fire with open arms.

At some point, Hux mindlessly trudges back to his desk, sitting down with a heavy thud into his chair, staring into the emptiness of his quarters. All his pent-up emotion is suddenly rushing forwards, surging though his veins and spreading though his chest, and he folds his arms atop his desk, burying his face, hiding his tears from the galaxy, body wracked with silent sobs.

///////////

Hux doesn’t remember falling asleep. Upon waking, head still buried in his arms, sat at his cold desk, he realises that he must’ve cried himself to sleep, thoughts wrapped around Kylo and how much he craves his touch.

Hux sits up slowly, already feeling an ache in his neck from his awkward position and a pounding headache from overindulging in the brandy. He sniffles, cheeks feeling coarse from tear tracks. He remembers everything, though he wishes he couldn’t; he’d told Kylo that he misses him, that he _loves_ him.

But as Hux pulls his head from his arms, he gasps, startled by the figure sitting on the side of his desk, staring down at the broken datapad in his hand.

“I’m good at fixing things, but this may be asking a bit much,” Kylo mutters, holding Hux’s smashed datapad up, eyebrows raised.

Hux stands up suddenly, but loses his balance and stumbles back, tripping over his chair, arms flailing, but he’s floating suddenly, as though invisible hands are holding onto his hips, cradling him.

“Easy, Hux,” Kylo says, hand outstretched. “I imagine your head is going to be bad after drinking the entire bottle of brandy.”

“You—“ Hux stutters as he’s eased back to his feet, palms flat on the desk to help regain his balance. “You’re here.”

Kylo nods once, slowly.

“My messages—did you…?”

“Yes. All of them.”

“ _And you didn’t reply?”_ Hux shouts, moving around the desk to stand in front of Kylo, fists clenched by his sides. “You just _let_ me stew in my feelings, laughing as I was sending them? You—you _selfish,_ son of a _fucking—”_

_“Hux.”_

Kylo’s strong hands around the tops of Hux’s arms pulls him from his angry ramblings, and Hux feels a calmness radiating from where Kylo’s hands meet his body, making him want to melt.

“I read them this morning. I…” Kylo’s sentence trails off slowly, his gaze cast aside for a moment before his dark eyes rise again to meet Hux’s. “I kept failing my final test. I couldn’t leave the training chamber until I’d passed it. I wanted to talk to you, I did, but I—couldn’t kill her.”

Hux feels his heart jitter, confused.

“Kill her? Who?” Hux echoes, shaking his head. “Ren. I don’t follow.”

“My mother.”

“ _Ren?”_

Kylo looks down, fighting back tears.

“Just a projection,” Kylo says, though the pain in his tone doesn’t lessen. “Snoke created an image of her and ordered me to kill her like I had with my father. He said she ties me to the Light, makes me weak. And you—.”

Kylo slides his palms up to cup Hux’s cheeks, his head tilting slightly as he stares. Hux frowns.

“I…what, Ren?” Hux holds his breath, noting the strange look in Kylo’s dark eyes. It’s not the same sort of hunger that he’s used to seeing; not the raw and unrelenting lust that usually consumes him when they’re about to sink into their urges. Kylo’s eyes are soft, _burdened,_ begging to be held, to be told that everything is going to be alright.

Kylo leans in slowly, lips brushing Hux’s, breath warm on his skin.

“You make me strong,” Kylo whispers. “You keep the Dark strong in me, fuels my passion, keeps me focussed. I thought that having your physical body was enough to keep me tethered to you but it’s not, Hux. It’s not enough. I didn’t think you’d have me like this but I—. Your messages. They were. _Everything._ They awakened something inside me, something that makes me feel stronger than I’ve ever felt.”

Hux finally feels himself melt.

“The last message I sent,” Hux breathes, shuddering, bringing his hands up to hold onto Kylo’s wrists. Kylo strokes his thumbs over Hux’s freckled cheeks, their gazes locked, the air silent. “Do you…?”

“ _Yes,”_ Kylo gasps, one tear escaping his barrier and trailing down his cheek. “I do. _I do,_ Hux.”

Boldly, Hux pushes forwards and takes Kylo’s lips into a fleeting kiss, heart fluttering, insides _melting._ He hears Kylo moan as he returns Hux’s kiss with equal, desperate vigour, hands holding Hux’s cheeks in place.

And for the first time, Hux feels happy to have been compromised by his feelings.

**Author's Note:**

> I can't help but think that Kylo would really hesitate in killing Leia. And Snoke would be fully aware of Kylo's weakness being his mother, and so part of his training would be getting him to kill a duplicate of her...but I don't even know whether a training exercise like that would help him? I don't know, I have a lot of Leia & Kylo/Ben feels! 
> 
> Thank you for reading! My tumblr is [@solohux](http://solohux.tumblr.com/) ❤️


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